You’ll probably say something like “the lasagna”, or “chicken fetuccini”. You’re less likely to order the steak.
Flipping that situation, you’d maybe say “a t-bone” or “the sirloin”. Probably not the lasagna.
That thinking is why I’m flabbergasted when I see that The Expendables has a 39% on Rotten Tomatoes.
When I go to a restaurant, I get what that restaurant is good at. When I go to a movie, I want to see what the filmmakers are good at. If I don’t want lasagna, I won’t go to Fazoli’s; if I don’t want to see Dolph Lundren blow a pirate in half in the first five minutes of a movie, I’m not going to go see The Expendables.
But I did want to see that, and I was not disappointed.
The Expendables could have been better, yes, but it was hardly a disappointment because I knew what I was in for. What I wanted was crazy, mind bending explosions and fist fights between the action heroes of my childhood and adolescence. What I wanted was Terry Crews wielding a tommy gun-shotgun that fired exploding rounds and blew up bad guys.
What I wanted was to see Sylvester Stallone and Dolph Lundgren on screen together again for the first time in 25 years.
I wanted to see Jet Li shoot people in the face while being all short and Asian and kung-fooey.
And I wanted to see Jason Statham throw knives through people.
We were never promised anything but that. This movie was not supposed to be Bourne Identity-complicated, or full of Rocky 1-and-2 character development. This was supposed to be a movie full of good guys, bad guys, a beautiful woman or two, and punching.
This movie was fun. I have a little problem with SPOILER IN INVISO-TEXT!!! the name because none of the guys actually die, bringing their actual expendability in to question END SPOILER!!!, but that’s really minor. I paid to see it twice, and I’m going to buy this movie when it’s BluRayified.