You remember my Cop Out review? It’s over here, if you wanna give it a read, to refresh your memory.
Go ahead. I’ll wait.
Okay, to recap (because you probably didn’t read it, and that’s cool cause I’m only making a comparison that I’m gonna explain anyways), Cop Out was funny, but the story wasn’t there. It’s like it was a bunch of skits loosely strung together with some semblance of a plot. That makes for some great quotes, but not so much a great movie.
The Bounty Hunter was the opposite, but the same. Like, exactly. It’s scary, actually.
The plot is there. It’s easy to follow. It just isn’t fun. This whole movie happens, and you’re wondering when the funny bits from the previews are going to happen. Well, those are the only funny bits in the entire movie. You could pretty much just watch the trailer for this movie and laugh more than you will when you actually see it, for two reasons: if you’re watching the trailer, it means you’re about to see a different movie, which is good, and if you’re watching the movie, that means you paid to see it, and that ain’t funny.
I dig Gerard Butler. He’s Scottish, I’m Scottish, he’s in movies where he kicks butt while being Scottish, so I can tell all my friends that that guy kicking butt shares a country of origin with me. It’s a good thing. He and Jennifer Aniston (in a slinky dress) are the two reasons I saw this movie, and they’re both decent actors. I don’t think this big Hunk of Fail is their fault: the script just wasn’t funny. It was advertised falsely, as something that it wasn’t, which is a comedy. It has all the trappings of a comedy (a decent set up, an absurd situation that you’re happy to believe could happen, a little peril to bring seriousness when necessary), it just didn’t deliver.
You don’t need to see this movie. You’ve seen everything here somewhere else, and a few glaring plot points (Gerard owes a bookie money, something that is never resolved, and he and Jen used to be married, and they talk about “what happened” a lot without telling us what happened, stuff like that) just kind of made it unnecessary. Also, there’s this one guy who is completely… guh. He’s supposed to be comic relief, but he’s mostly just annoying, and about halfway through the movie he disappears, just to make a phone call at the end to remind everyone that he was there to begin with. Pointless.
This movie got a lower score than Cop Out because that movie at least made me laugh. Here, I’m just short of egging the director’s house.